NEWGROUNDS THE REAL EGGMAN LYRICS

May I have your attention slaves?
I will have your attention slaves!
Will the real Eggman please stand up
I repeat
Will the real Eggman please stand up
(Uungh, I can't)

You all act like you never seen a round guy before
Stomach all over the floor
like somebody's drank 3 billion of Coors
I've been eating hours before the first rooster crowed
And now I plan to rap you to bore...

I weigh so many pounds, it's true I'm not kidding
I don't do the work, my robots do my bidding
Sonic said "no way"
Sonic says... he's still alive argh!

I probably got a couple screws in my bots loose
But it's nothing worse than what's going on in Rouge's bedroom (Eeeh!)
Sometimes I wanna go the detonate** and destroy
But can't 'cause I need those chaos emeralds

Sonic's fast like this, Sonic's fast like that
And he somehow manages to stop all my attacks
And that's the reason why my plans are all crap
If I don't get those emeralds I'll surely be jacked

Of course you're gonna stop me at your fast pace
By the time you reach my base I'll be outta that place
And when you defeat me please don't start to celebrate
For I'll return once again at a later date

I'm like the "Stay-Puft" man 'cause you can't kill me
Anything you try will just bounce right offa me
My big tubby face goes on the TV
To announce you won't survive in the debris

And there's several of them just like me
Who dress like me, sit, command,
opress like me, mustache like me
And a big piece of lard like me
And just might be an evil villain but not quite me

I'm the Eggman, yes the real Eggman
And you other robotniks aren't as fat as I am
So won't the real Eggman please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up
I'm the Eggman, yes the real Eggman
And you other robotniks aren't as fat as I am
So won't the real Eggman please stand up,
can't stand up,
Can't stand up?!